A Stress Free New Year
New Year is a time many people make “resolutions”. Of course many of those are broken only a short time after they’re made, but I’ll bet there’s one resolution few people make, that being, to have a stress-free New Year. Perhaps people don’t resolve to get rid of stress because they know that’s like resolving not to breathe! It’s impossible! Yet, we can all reduce our stress level if we follow a simple plan, the plan the Virgin Mary practiced in her own life. It’s a simple plan and we can do it!
Let’s consider Mary for a moment. Think of how many stressful, life-altering events, she experienced in her life. First, an angel visited her and told her that she would have a son. We might try to romanticize the angel’s visit, but if we’re careful listeners, we’ll understand that the experience, though joyful, wasn’t particularly calming for Mary. Of course, an angelic visitation isn’t calming for anyone. That’s why, whenever an angel appears to someone in the Scriptures, they always immediately say, “Do not be afraid!” It’s not ordinary to see angels and it must be a very frightening experience. Perhaps that’s why the angels always reassure us whenever they appear. So, Mary’s first life-changing event was a visit by the archangel (and not an ordinary rank-and-file angel at that) Gabriel.
Mary also experienced other stress-producing events. She was pregnant before her marriage—now that’s a big one! Although today premarital pregnancy has lost most of its stigma, in Mary’s time it was a very big deal. There were severe legal penalties an unwed mother worried about. If that weren’t enough, Joseph almost ended his engagement to Mary because of it. That’s what we read in the Gospel of Matthew. If it hadn’t been for an angel who appeared to Joseph in a dream, the prophecy spoken to Mary would have never been accomplished. Now, that’s stress!
Then there’s Mary’s marriage. Now, marriage is a joyful event, but preparing for it is definitely stress producing. Ask any bride and she’ll tell you. Don’t ask the grooms, as most leave everything up to their brides to plan! There are a great many details and many opportunities for things to go wrong. That, from my two decades of experience working with brides, is always stressful. Now, I haven’t personally met one, but I’ve heard there is such a thing as a “bridezilla” – that’s definitely a bride with too much stress! So, preparing for marriage must have been a very stressful time for Mary.
Then came the birth! Mary’s honeymoon was barely behind her and she was giving birth to Jesus, and she had a long and difficult journey on top of that! Perhaps the birth experience was different for Mary, but if you’re ever in a delivery room, just go ahead and ask the mother if she’s under stress, as she’s screaming in pain. I’m sure, she’ll grab you by the collar and shriek, “You bet I’m under stress!”
So, if anyone ever had reason for stress, it was Mary, the mother of Jesus and the wife of Joseph. How did she cope? What was her secret? Well, the Gospel of Luke provides the answer, “She treasured all these things and reflected on them in her heart.” That’s it—she “treasured” and “reflected”—there’s no better way to deal with the inevitability of stress in our lives.
Now, Mary was a human being. Deacon Jerry, in his homily last weekend, mentioned that the Holy Family is different from ours in one very important way—in their household they had two saints and the Son of God. That’s true, but remember that saints are human beings, like all the rest of us. Even godly people experience stress, perhaps godly people experience more stress than the rest of us. So Mary, because she was human, experienced the same confusion and difficulties as the rest of us. She could not envision what would happen to her and, as the Gospels testify, she had to work to understand what was going on. Saint Luke mentions that fact twice in his Gospel, but at the same time, in the face of incomprehensible events, Mary responded with reflection and thankfulness. That’s what sustained her. She believed God had a plan and that she had a part if helping Him carry it out. It was her conviction. So, Mary may not have understood events any better as they happened, but she was able to accept them in a way most of us fail to do, and she was constant in walking with God, and trusting in Him, no matter what.
Today, and always, we are called to follow Mary’s example. We’re called to believe as she believed—to believe that God has a plan and that we have a part in helping Him carry it out. It must be our conviction. How do we begin to develop that conviction? Again, going back to Mary’s simple formula—we develop an ability to reflect and to be thankful. If we can begin to adopt Mary’s approach as our own, then we’ll find ourselves less prone to the effects of stress. Things will always happen, including some bad things, but we’ll receive the strength to endure all things peacefully if we learn to face the challenges of life as did Mary. Then we’ll grow in grace and blessings and the Lord will look kindly upon us and give us His peace.
So, may you have a happy stress-free New Year!